[00:36] Welcome to the Ziglar Show. This is episode 459, and today I bring you Zig Ziglar. Today we get a bit more serious message from Zig on a serious topic: Our character. As always, he is not merely speaking of the right thing to do or being righteous for righteousness’ sake; he is giving us the foundational goal for being a right person. Why? So we can have the success we desire and help others to achieve it also. So, unless you have achieved all that you want, this show is for you. I know it is for me.
[01:54] Hey, everyone, I am Kevin Miller, your host of The Ziglar Show. If you ever heard this quote, that holding onto anger, grudges, un-forgiveness,are like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die, in today’s message, Zig shares a similar prospective of how we speak about others is virtually the same thing and gets the same results. I see it as a lot more subtle than just be angry with someone. I want you to hear Zig, and then we will briefly break things down.
[04:06] Zig continues: One of the things about being in a relationship is you need to remember that “the mic is always open and the lights are always on.”
[08:40] How important our relationship is: God issued two commands on which He hangs all the law and prophets: 1. Love God, and 2. Love your neighbor as yourself. Albert Einstein put it this way: “Love thy neighbor as yourself” is like a natural law, almost like a physical post of the universe.
[11:27] Our words are so important. We need to be very careful about what we say to and about other people.
[12:11] If we listen as others are maligned, and are inclined to believe what we hear, our relationship with the vilified individual is forever altered. In other words, we are involuntarily influenced by everything we hear; harmless gossip doesn’t exist, listening to gossips can even leave us feeling dissatisfied with our spouse, children, employees, friends, our lives in general. Speaking gossip usually leaves us feeling less worthy. Words penetrate our souls and cannot be erased or ignored.
[14:55] So there is a significant message there from Zig. Folks, I want you to think about the people you know in your family, your work, your church, your social group, your school, people that you are consistently around. Now think about who among them are doing well. Now question whether the people you think are doing well are very happy. Think about that person, and what Zig said…how often do you hear them talking negatively about others? How often do you see them speaking criticism, gossip? Are they doing in such ways? Are they thinking in such ways? Of course, chances are they are not. That is significantly telling. And, conversely, think about those people who are speaking negatively that way. How does it seem to be working for them? I am not talking about success in one area; we are talking about whole lives and goals.
[17:50] Alternatively, what Zig wants us to do is to get in front of the mirror and do a self-audit, meaning someone is recording us talking, at the workplace, at lunch, with our families in the evening. How would we rate?
[19:48] To speak in a negative way affects us. It really does. So, again, if you are not consciously aware that you proactively are taking the moment captive, your speech captive, to speak the positive, not the negative, you probably are speaking a lot more negatively than you realize.
[20:25] Most mornings, my kids have positive songs they listen to, as some listen in schools. The song is called, “Speak Life.” We used that. I ask my kids, “Is that speaking of life or not speaking life?” They say, “Speaking death, Daddy.” So, are we speaking life? Are we encouraging life? Are we speaking positively?
[25:25] Anybody who is speaking in a negative way, it is coming from a negative feeling. So, to give somebody grace is another aspect that we can grab onto. Zig said next that we can’t hide our character.
[27:55] We all know this, we are so aware of the truth in others. We can smell the authenticity, the fake, the genuine, a mile away; we can spot it in others. Likewise, though,we are known, as well. Our character is obvious to others at the core and can be seen and testified to by our friends, We know this, our family, our kids and spouse, our co-workers, I mean, they know us and you can go to those people and they know who you are.
[28:57] We are talking about character here, and the power and authority do not indicate our character, just we talked about in regards to success.
[29:57] Zig then says to make sure that your heart and your attitude are right. Sometimes it is difficult to put your heart and attitude in the same line, and so the self-talk cards will really help. You can find them at ziglar.com/selftalk. We can reprogram our brains. And we can make our heart and our attitude brighter.
[31:05] Zig quotes the Biblical Scripture, “Love God, love your neighbor as yourself.” Zig said this because often we do not love ourselves well and this is because we don’t love others. On that move we can generally understand that we may be selfish; we tend to our own needs first, and often thinking about what we do, what we need. Can we give the natural focus that we typically give to ourselves, can we give that to God, can we give that to others?
[32:50] Often, bad behavior, negative behavior, negative speaking, sarcasm, comes from not loving oneself. And it is a root cause of our own negative thinking, negative speaking, and the cause for those we are negatively speaking about. Think about that.
[34:00] So, Zig says a root is to loving ourselves. A question remains if we truly love ourselves. Zig ends his message by definitively driving home the absolute acute consequences regarding what we say to and about other people.
[35:09] I had a conversation recently with my kids about this, of speaking life. When we speak negatively or disrespectfully, we are proactively promoting ourselves. Of course, it is relevant; we try to bring relevant analogy. Our testimonies or culture say that is how we make the decision, or we just let our flesh immediately respond and speak negatively about others, we gossip about them, we criticize them, we speak sarcasticly about them; it hurts. We are hurting that person if they hear it, and even if they don’t hear it, we are hurting those around us.